Nothing 2 Bring

we got here to the hospital about an hour ago. Shepherd is still working REALLY hard to breath, even on the oxygen. They are just going to take it hour to hour and try to get him through the next few days, hoping he'll gain strength. It's so hard to watch him struggle and know how miserable he is. The docs are totally committed to trying to keep him off of the breathing tube, but nor very optimistic. To be very honest, I know that without God's help, Shepherd will not stay off the vent. Truly, we are standing in complete need of God's provision- a miracle. And I am humbly aware that there is the possibility that His help will not show up they way I'd like it to. But oh, I pray it does. I pray,pray, and pray and hope. 

If he tires out and has to be re-intubated, the next thing they will talk about is a tracheostomy. Of course, at this point, my heart is filled with fear and disappointment at this prospect. I am really struggling to accept this as a possibility. I just don't understand how heart surgery can seem so simple and getting a full term baby off a breathing tube can seem so impossible. I know that to these doctors, and even maybe to some of you, a trach seems like a rather simple solution to our problems. But I have met all these parents in the PICU who's kids end up with trachs and it appears to be very complicated and unpleasant (infection, bleeding out, another surgery, all kinds of stuff). I am so grateful for the staffs ability to help Shepherd, but sometimes it seems the more they do , the more they need to do and it just has this downhill domino affect.

Ultimately, I have got to place my hope in God, and I have to believe that if His help shows up in a different way than I would like, that my hope is not disappointed. It's very up and down. Please pray for us to cast all our hope on God and trust the road he has for our little boy to walk down, no matter how painful.